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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26421244">The Most Beautiful Man</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeirdFangirlingPersona/pseuds/WeirdFangirlingPersona'>WeirdFangirlingPersona</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Per Aspera Ad Astra [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cuddles, Earl Grey Tea - Freeform, Established Relationship, First War with Voldemort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Living Together, M/M, MWPP, Post Full Moon, Scars, Self-Esteem Issues, Sirius Black is a Good Boyfriend, Werewolf Remus Lupin, healer!Sirius, i wrote this at 2am, order mission</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 02:40:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,654</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26421244</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeirdFangirlingPersona/pseuds/WeirdFangirlingPersona</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The bed dips under Sirius' weight as he climbs on the mattress next to him. "Come on, Rem. Come out of the blanket cocoon and have some food. You haven't eaten all day," he says softly. </p><p>Remus doesn't move. Instead, he asks something he's meant to ask Sirius for a while now. Hidden from view, he allows some of the worry and fear to seep into his voice. "Why are you staying with me?"</p><p>(This fic is a standalone)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Sirius Black/Remus Lupin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Per Aspera Ad Astra [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1292771</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>237</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Most Beautiful Man</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Remus feels miserable. He's also hiding under the covers. He knows it's childish and probably useless because the one person he's trying to hide from shares the flat with him, but the uselessness of his solutions has never stopped him from executing them before so why start now. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He can hear Sirius shuffling in the kitchen, the kettle whistling and the mugs tinkling. The strong, sweet spicy aroma of bergamot is slowly wafting through the open door to their bedroom. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus exhales. Earl Grey then. That means Sirius is making tea for Remus as well as for himself. Remus doesn't drink any other but Sirius prefers green tea and yet he always makes Earl Grey for both of them whenever they're home together. He says he doesn't mind having the same as Remus but Remus knows he does it just because the water for Earl Grey needs to be heated just slightly under the boiling point whereas the water for green tea should be around 80°C. He told Sirius multiple times that he can make his green tea first and Remus can boil the kettle for his Earl Grey later but Sirius just looked at him while walking to the couch with their mugs and answered, "But then we would never get to drink the tea together," like it's the most obvious thing on the planet. Just like that, casually hitting Remus' feelings in all the right places. How dare he. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He secures the blanket over his face tighter and burrows deeper into the pillows. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Footsteps. Sirius is walking over and placing something on his nightstand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Love, I made us some sandwiches and tea. Marlene is coming to pick me up for the Order mission later. I thought we could eat together in bed before she arrives so you don't have to get up?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus groans. He doesn't deserve this man.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Yesterday's full moon was terrible. He hasn't had a bad one like that in years. The deep exhaustion is still lingering in his bones, his joints ache and muscles feel strained, stretched on a body that looks way too old to be this young. He's normally somewhat functioning the evening after. Not today.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He fell asleep right after Sirius healed the worst wounds on his ribs and thighs and apparated them back to their flat. In times like this, he's beyond grateful Sirius chose being a healer as his career. It makes the post full moon mornings so much easier. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He slept like the dead through most of the day and if that wasn't any indication of how bad the night was, the dull pain in his entire body should have been enough. But none of that prepared him for the shock he found himself in when he stumbled to the bathroom to use the loo and saw his face in the mirror. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There, still red and not fully healed yet, was a new scar across his face. </span>
</p><p><span>Now, scars weren't anything new. He's used to having them all over his entire body and finding new ones after almost every full moon. But never before has a scar appeared on his face. It's strange really, that he has managed to avoid his entire head for so long. He probably didn't have this big area of smooth unblemished skin anywhere else on his body. Well, not anymore. </span><em><span>Run out of luck, I suppose, </span></em><span>he</span> <span>ponders</span><em><span>.</span></em></p><p>
  <span>Remus never thought of his own face as something exceptionally beautiful or desirable. But the fresh scar, raised and big and ugly, spanning from his right temple, going under his eye, across his nose and ending on the left side of his jaw, makes him look absolutely horrendous. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He's already self conscious and standing next to his gorgeous boyfriend makes him feel unsure at the best of times and inadequate and undeserving at worst. How much worse is it going to be now?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The bed dips under Sirius' weight as he climbs on the mattress next to him. "Come on, Rem. Come out of the blanket cocoon and have some food. You haven't eaten all day," he says softly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus doesn't move. Instead, he asks something he's meant to ask Sirius for a while now. Hidden from view, he allows some of the worry and fear to seep into his voice. "Why are you staying with me?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What do you mean?" Sirius confusedly inquires. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Why are you dating me?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, hands are caressing his curls back softly and trying to take the blanket off his face. Remus just holds it tighter.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Because I love you. What kind of question is that? What's going on?" Sirius is starting to sound worried.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus only grumbles in response.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Love, take the blanket off your face and talk to me. I'm not having this conversation with you hidden under the covers."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Well then get used to it because I'm not coming out from under them any time soon, " he retorts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What? Why?</span>
  <span>"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Because my face is disgusting and no one needs to see it, least of all my very attractive boyfriend." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius doesn't answer. Then he shifts his body so he's laying behind Remus and hugs him completely within his cocoon to his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>"If this is about your new scar I already know about it. Not only because I saw you make it yourself in the forest but also because I healed the wound and carried you to bed, all the while with your face pretty much visible and I haven't combusted or turned to stone from the sight so I think I'm good. Now, as your official healer, I would like to inspect my patient, please."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hot burning shame runs through Remus' body. Sirius does so much for him - turns into a dog to run around all night every month, has to watch his lover turn into a bloodthirsty beast, he looks after him, heals his wounds and makes him tea and he even reads to him sometimes, when the full moon isn't that bad. Remus really doesn't deserve him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>What does he have to offer in return? Cynicism, snarky comments, empty bank account, and petulance. He could have at least told himself he's a good enough shag but will Sirius even be able to look at him </span>
  <em>
    <span>like that</span>
  </em>
  <span> when the most prominent feature of his face is forever going to remind him (and everyone else) what a monster he really is?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Tears prickle in the corners of his eyes and he sniffles. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius, alarmed, takes the blanket Remus has hidden under and tugs at it again. It comes off easily, Remus is not clutching at it anymore, and finally uncovers his face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius puts his palm on Remus' left cheek and smiles at him tenderly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Here you are, love."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He starts studying the scar with a wrinkle on his forehead that appears every time he's focusing on something. "It's healing very well. The scar shouldn't be too prominent but it will probably stay. I'm sorry about that. I tried to spell it as soon as you transformed back but you know how it is with werewolf injuries. They rarely heal completely."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus frowns. "You take such good care of me already, Sirius. Don't you dare apologize for something you can't control."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius grins. "Then there's no need to hide something YOU can't control either, is there? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus' frown deepens. "That's hardly the same thing."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius kisses his nose. "It makes no difference to me, Remus. You're still you. I still love you. And I will continue to do so," he traces one of his fingers along the scar, "whether you have ten of these or none".</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus gazes into Sirius' eyes and when he finds nothing but truth and honest devotion, he lets himself be gently kissed into the pillows.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he wakes up later, he finds the bed empty but he can hear Sirius chatting with somebody behind the closed bedroom door. Marlene must be here then.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus gets up to greet her and groans when his limbs crackle in protest. He's almost at the door when he hears what they're talking about.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"....it was a rough night," Sirius explains.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"I hope Remus is okay." Marlene's voice sounds tired, like everyone's in the Order these days.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"He has some new scars but otherwise he'll be okay."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"..."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Marlene," Sirius growls. She must have made a face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Oh no, I didn't mean it like that. Actually, I think it fits him. He has this...roguish vibe and the scars just make him look edgy. Not that I would be into it even if I swung that way but I always wondered if you…"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"What are you on about?" Sirius demands, his voice still a little angry.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marlene takes a deep breath. "So many pretty people chasing you, but it was only ever Remus for you. Why?"</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sirius sighs and stays quiet for a minute. Remus almost thinks he's not going to answer. Why should he, anyway? Maybe Marlene just made him see the truth, maybe he realized he would like to date someone else after all, maybe he finally sees the stark absurdity of someone as gorgeous as Sirius dating someone as hideous as Rem-</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"You know, sometimes you meet someone so beautiful, and then you actually get to talk to them and five minutes later, they're as dull as a brick. Then there are other people and you meet them and you think, "Not bad, they're okay." And then you get to know them and… And their face just sort of… Becomes them, like their personality is written all over it. And they just… They turn into something so beautiful." </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pauses and then exhales, "Remus is the most beautiful man I've ever met."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Remus doesn't come into the living room to say hi to Marlene for another ten minutes. And if it's because he had to sit for a moment and dry some tears, who's to say?</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The last thing Sirius says in this fic is inspired by <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnnWUoLcmns&amp;feature=youtu.be">this scene</a> from Doctor Who.</p><p>Thank you so much for reading! Come say hi to <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/weird-fangirling-persona">Tumblr!</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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